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The Happiness Equation

 
 
Lisa  Ocker  May 4, 2008  Categories: Relationships, Relationships /Social, Well-Being /Life Balance, Well-Being

What do you get when you put 100 happy people together?

Well, lots of laughs, for starters. And a few common traits, says best-selling author Marci Shimoff, who interviewed 100 unconditionally happy people for Happy for No Reason: Steps to Being Happy from the Inside Out.

Among the Happy 100, as she called them, one shared habit is focusing on the solution rather than the problem—instead of worrying or complaining, they tend to concentrate on the good in the situation and on improving it.

Another truth, “Happy people let love lead in their lives,” she says. “Although they have the same kind of fears, pains and disappointments as the rest of us, they simply have different habits that allow them to keep their hearts open in their daily lives.” One aspect of this is focusing on gratitude. “People who are happy for no reason don’t necessarily have more in their lives to be grateful for; they simply focus more often on gratitude throughout their day.”

Regardless of their religious traditions, the Happy 100 tend to connect to something larger than themselves.

“People who are happy for no reason don’t always need to figure everything out to be in control; they live in the fl ow of life, trusting underlying benevolence and wisdom from that larger wholeness,” Marci says.

While they don’t rely on others to brighten their spirits, the Happy 100 also seek a “nourishing support system,” surrounding themselves with positive people, she says.

Another key to happiness is living an inspired life, Marci says, discovering your passion and incorporating that into everything you do.

Also essential to happiness are your physical and mental well-being. Exercising, eating right and getting enough sleep are essential. And,last but not least: a positive attitude.

“The ultimate reason we want anything is that we think it will make us happier,” Marci says. “So what I say to people is to go for the happiness first and all else follows.”

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  • An Attitude for Gratitude
    I have found gratitude to be the single most powerful tool in so many aspects of my life but where it becomes most useful is in my relationships with people. Although younger, I have been fortunate to have earned the opportunity to manage a sales team. My team has various ages from newly graduated to mid-40's and the single most powerful tool to earn their respect and continued hard work is to praise them and thank them for all that they do. Although some are higher performers than others, I am confident that each is giving their absolute best. I attribute their motivation and the success of the team to be a result of showing each other gratitude. Hint: this also works wonders in personal relationships! It could be the one tool that could stop all fights before they happen.
  • Doing it takes practice
    I myself am a pretty happy person most of the time. When I am unhappy I am focusing in the problem, not the solution or what is good about what is happening at that moment. I live in a household of 3 people. Of those I am the the happiest and most positive in the household. One of the people here is always worried that if good happens then it is bound to be followed by something bad. Although I have been living with them for a few years, and sometimes suggest a change in perspective, they do not choose to follow suit. I have learned being happy seems to come naturally to me, and those that are not so happy do not tend to want to learn to be happy, despite what they say.

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